"Tighter than dicks hatband"
I like that one but I have always wondered...............who is Dick?

Nastier than three food up a bulls a$$.
Slicker than greased owl sh!t
Its hotter than a west Texas road lizzard.
Its colder than a well diggers A$$ in Montana
If he had any brains he'd take em' out and play with em'
Looking for yesterday
What is time to a hog?
It dont cost any more to feed a good dog (cow or horse) than it does a sorry one.